Every day inspiration challenge…
Day Ten: Let the Scene Write Itself.
Quawra …Malta – its lunchtime, 22 degrees and the sun feels hot in between breaks of a cool breeze. I’m in a Café del Mar on a small rock cluster, the Jolly Roger is flying full mast. There’s no beach as such, just bald patches of sand located in gaps of rock. Malta is bang in the middle of the Med and the Mediterranean Sea is tideless. I’m guessing due to this that heavy waves don’t lash the shore so a real beach just never formed over time.
I can see my friend and travel companion sitting meditating near the waters edge. The Norwegian (Oulie ) we’ve took hostage has headed back to the hotel to catch the next meeting. The bar is playing some chilled out dance music, familiar lyrics but sung in a foreign tongue. As is the conversations of those sat around me. I’m feeling very chilled. Whatever the crazies are up to back in the world it has no relevance here. Just for today.
The scenery is quaint and pretty, it’s a long way from San Antonio Bay or the Magaluf Strip, as the iced Diet Pepsi reminds me. I’m alive, awake and as sober as it gets. Just for today, one day at a time! A sail boats sprints across the bay. In the distance a cargo ship chugs its load west and my buddy leaps into the sea.
I’ve traveled a lot since getting sober but this is the first time to a location that ticks all the boxes of previous drinking holidays of the past. The miracle is I’m at peace with that and myself, I’m getting better, Step by Step! We are out here for the 11th International AA Malta Convention and it’s been awesome. The speakers have been inspirational, funny and are such a positive example of how to make it through each day without needing to take that first drink and go “Fuck Up” again. Im enjoying the experience massively… uncharted waters! People are walking by, couples holding hands, kids doing what kids do. The lucky lucky man tries to sell sunglasses and fake Rolex’s to the next table, the banter is hilarious. He doesn’t stay long when it’s my turn, we both share some form of insane laughter then he is quickly on his way.
I was up early again this morning, just after sunrise. I headed out for a walk and a spot of breakfast, followed by group meditation and an early meeting, it was yoga yesterday. It feels beautiful to go at this pace with some organised activities to dip in and out of alongside sightseeing and chilling. It’s very much the opposite of how it was 5 years ago. This reminds me that all this works and is worth the huge amount of effort I put in on a daily basis, especially through the challenging times. I’m grateful for the tough times the most, they were the times that brought the growth. I wouldn’t be sitting here on this glorious day, the man I am if I never experienced those days where it all felt uphill and never ending. Acceptance, faith, trust and action brought some massive changes. I don’t fancy ever going back to the way it was, there’s nothing there for me anymore.
I head back up onto the road and stop off at ‘Vinnies’ Pasta & Grill. I order the Ravioli Napolitan. It’s day 25 of my ‘Veggie’ for a month experiment and it’s going well. I don’t think I will ever give meat up completely, I could eat a rare steak for breakfast every day. I started to get sick of the uncomfortable bloating from eating meat nearly every day so thought I would try a break from it. Its done me good and I think I’m going to keep going for another month.
The food at ‘Vinnies’ was delicious. Sitting people watching afterwards I decide to head back and find the others. There’s an early evening meeting I want to make followed by a sauna and Japanese massage I booked this morning. The Sun feels hot on my neck, that cargo ship seems to have come to a halt in the bay and I can understand why. That cold and damp dreary English winter is 2000 miles behind me. I’m in no hurry either.
“We’re all looking at the people around us, the people who have gone before us who have succeeded in recovery and have long-term sobriety and they are an illustration for us of how good it can be.” ~ Scott Stevens
“If a man doesn’t change then I think theres something seriously wrong with him, I guess I’m living in the present more than the past” ~ Clint Eastwood
D&O in Fresno via Malta